Blindsided

To blindside someone is bad enough. But to be blindsided by someone you expect only happy returns from – that feeling is unexplainable. The depth of hurt is beyond words. I don’t know if this feeling could go away. For a person who has self-esteem issues, this is hard on me. It will take me a long while before I recover from this. You’re invisible to me for now. Truthfully, what I feel like doing is to scream bloody murder right in front of your face to let go of this buried painful and hurtful feelings. But that ain’t gonna happen so I’m gonna be civil during any meets. Maybe I’m too kind to certain people which is why I have this barrier put up all the time. But when this barrier cease to exist and I get this kind of treatment from someone I least expect, I am not gonna be nice about it. You want respect? I can give you respect but only if YOU respect me first. Otherwise, you don’t deserve my respect at all. Period.

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